"What led you here?"
This question is often asked when you start a new job and certainly when you create a business.
When did the idea start? Why does this matter? What motivates you? What are you seeking to change or offer?
For me this didn't start with the frontline work I did with survivors. They are the inspiration, though, always.
It started when working in positions where I was faced with data about people; when my concept of the world was challenged by what I was learning. Naturally, as you are growing up you are genuinely influenced by that which is in your own frame of reference or has been fed to you from external sources. You start to realise how much prejudice and stereotyping exists.
It's not like I hadn't had my own adversity or experiences of trauma, I wasn't totally ignorant to what can happen to people. However, I started to be exposed to it constantly and seeing different outcomes for different people. I saw varying barriers and treatment, individuals who had become involved in criminality, substance misuse, and more; people labelled and ostracised. Things people might often say stem from their so-called 'choices' and behaviours.
Since working in sectors where trauma is at the root of most of the work being done, to use 'choice' feels ignorant, overly simplified, and not an honest reflection of the human experience. It feels riddled with privilege and judgment, disconnected from compassion. 'We all have choices' can feel like a true statement but we don’t all get to make choices from the same start point, or with the same information, or even the same internal system programming in our bodies. A choice doesn't mean the person gets to choose between a great outcome and a negative outcome; sometimes this so-called 'choice' is to have to pick between which option is the least harmful - not the most positive.
Consider the person fleeing a violent home who may have to pick between starving and stealing to stay alive?
Some of why this matters to me because when we are younger we are taught simple life rules about if we do [a certain behaviour] we will get [a certain outcome]. In general, I do understand why we are shown life in this simplified way at times. However, I think we aren't talking enough about the reality of the previously mentioned human experience. That it's not as simple that if we do something positive we always get something positive.
We know people will face adversity, we know people will experience deep trauma but what I don't understand is why we haven't been taught key things. Things like how our mind processes information, stress, and trauma, how our bodies and nervous systems change, and ultimately about our rights. Things that are not a secret, things that are out there but aren't being brought to people enough. Sometimes these are things that can be spoken about in overly complicated language. This is where my motivation is for Thrive Safe.
We aren't taught enough about recognizing, processing, or understanding the effects of harm and adversity. We also aren't taught to truly believe in recovery or healing. This doesn't mean we will completely forget or move on without any impact. Instead, it means understanding that some diagnoses are not permanent and do not define us. We often lack the knowledge needed to help us process, heal, and thrive.
Society often fails to consider what someone has experienced, instead opting to discard, dismiss, and judge them. It's easier for our brains to resort to stereotypes and ask, "What is wrong with someone?" rather than seeking challenging information. There are many reasons why our brains do this, some of which I'll discuss in another blog. These are also things I'm still learning about.
We face barriers in workplaces who don't understand and an education system that can often miss opportunities to help with healing. This post is not to point fingers or suggest this is someone's fault but I do feel I can play a part in contributing to better change.
I want workplaces and schools to feel comfortable discussing wellbeing, adversity, and trauma. They should understand they don't need to fix or have all the answers or solutions. It's important for them to know that health and safety responsibilities go beyond just the physical aspect.
I want people to know that other people care. I want people to stop being labelled and stigmatised. I want to remove barriers to healing.
I believe that if we create space to share our judgments in a way that we are curiously compassionate, we can learn together. This in turn means we can change together, helping ourselves and others along way.
If we create awareness, we can create conditions for change that influence a healthier and more psychologically safe society. It might be dreamworld mentality but I want to start as big as possible and do my best to never stop trying to reach that.
Comments